Being tender and open is beautiful. As a woman, I feel continually shhh’ed. Too sensitive. Too mushy. Too wishy washy. Blah blah. Don’t let someone steal your tenderness. Don’t allow the coldness and fear of others to tarnish your perfectly vulnerable beating heart. Nothing is more powerful than allowing yourself to truly be affected by things. Whether it’s a song, a stranger, a mountain, a rain drop, a tea kettle, an article, a sentence, a footstep, feel it all – look around you. All of this is for you. Take it and have gratitude. Give it and feel love.
— Zooey Deschanel
I know everyone has their opinions on Zooey Deschanel (I dedicated a whole post to it) and just women in the entertainment industry in general, and I wanted to write a big post today completely unrelated to any of this, but I read this quote and I felt like it was everything I have wanted to say and believe and share for most of my sensitive little life.
I can breathe in this quote for a while, because, like Zooey and also like my soul sister in Mean Girls who doesn’t even go here, I just have a lot of feelings.
We can blame it on the cold weather making me more sensitive, or we can all make another joke about women having crazy hormones that make them feel too much, or my sentimental heart, but sometimes I just want to drop all my cool cards and tell everyone that I feel things! And I can’t stop feeling them! And maybe I feel them too much! And maybe I love everything too hard and too much! And maybe I am very affected by good songs, baby animals, the way christmas lights look through the car window when you’re driving at night, a chapter from book whose words hit you square in the chest, and a sweet text message that I didn’t know how much I needed! And maybe I should stop feeling so much and loving so much and so often! And stop sharing my feelings with people I barely know, like at the grocery store when the deli lady simply asked you how your day is going and you let her know you’re afraid of adulthood!
Or maybe not.
Maybe I just need a nap. Or a stack of pancakes. Or to figure out how to not let myself get so wrapped up in little stresses.
Or maybe I should just feel things, no matter how messy or out of place or obnoxious they might be. Maybe I should just love things and forget about all the rest.
Or maybe I should just share a cup of coffee with Zooey, because lord knows I’m ‘quirky’ enough.