I know that I can talk about the ongoing love affair that I have with my coffeemaker pretty constantly–
–but until I actually get coffee into my system, no talking usually occurs. You see, I’m not exactly a morning person, and by “not exactly” I mean that I walk around in a zombie-like state for a long time and every day I bless my parents for having to grow up with the grumpiest crankiest child for 18 straight years of mornings.
However, television makes me feel even worse about this.
On every show that seems to have any little trace of family values, the morning is used as a normal, productive time. Television show characters all sit around the breakfast table and drink neon-orange juice out of spotless glasses, Dad reads the paper with his coffee mug in one hand and Mom asks the kids about their upcoming school days. IS THIS REAL LIFE?!
I’m not saying that my family didn’t communicate and love each other, but it certainly wasn’t as put-together and picturesque. I mean, everyone in tv shows is dressed and ready and super-awake when the sun comes up. Full House was always a party in the AM. Leave It To Beaver constructed major plot points before 7 o’clock. Heck, even the drama of The OC had happy times with bagels!
Some shows have countered this with a little more truth. Modern Family probably gets the most realistic, everyone-on-their-phones approach,
and, of course, Arrested Development will ALWAYS take the cake in my book,
but even so, I still feel like every morning is supposed to be shiny and Brady-Bunch-happy-go-lucky!
This is probably not ever going to be reality–
–but give me a breakfast taco and some caffeine and I’ll do my best to add my own laugh track. Or, at the very least, a coherent sentence once in a while before I rush out of the door to bigger and better things: like, say, lunchtime.