I don’t often post about boys/men/guys/fellas/’significant others’ because I think I live in constant fear that I will become one of “those girls” who will ramble about relationship issues for too long. (Okay, actually, if I’m being serious, I totally am one of those girls, but I don’t really think the internet is a place for it. Hooray honesty!!) However, this is a blessed month:
Welcome to No Shave November!
Let us celebrate!
(In case you didn’t know, Fleet Foxes are the official mascots this year.)
Should we celebrate this month with a song? We should!
Okay, all hooplah aside, beards are a big deal. I don’t claim to have a ‘type’ of man that I fall for or anything, but I just want to say, as a 21 year-old girl, grow out your scruff this month, boys! I mean, I know that beards are a touchy subject (literally) and not everyone’s grows in spectacularly, but there’s something about a little lumberjack-lookalike that I and many of my peer-aged girlfriends happen to love.
In order to pinpoint why exactly I, and a sizeable demographic of the female population enjoy beards, I have devised some theories.
WHY WOMEN LOVE BEARDS/’staches:
Beards and ‘staches remind us of the old Brawny Paper Towel guy, and everyone knows that cleanliness is next to godliness
The hope that maybe a small adorable bird could use your beard for a nest
It’s free entertainment (as in, we can throw things in it to see if they stay there, stroke it, and just generally get hours of activities out of it)
Beards are warm and we love being warm. Or really, we just love relying on guys to be warm because carrying extra layers is annoying, and nothing gives an excuse to cuddle (which is a universal girl-loved activity) like, “I’M COOOOLD!”
Gandalf, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Aragorn and Dumbledore all had gnarly beards, and all girls are all secret nerds
Beards take patience to grow. This shows us that if you were willing to wait 3 weeks for hair to come in perfectly, you can wait 5 minutes longer when we are deciding what froyo flavor to eat or what pair of shoes goes best with our outfit.
Beards and plaid make you look like a lumberjack. Lumberjacks are hot because lumberjacks build things from their bare hands and every woman wants a man to build her a house, duh! RIGHT?! (…or is that just my weird quirk? Seriously?)
No matter the reason, No Shave November or Movember (for mustache-November!) is for a good cause. Plenty of Mo-participants help raise money toward prostate cancer research by using their beards and ‘staches as walking billboards for the cause! How great is that?!
So, embrace your beards, men of the world. If you can’t grow one, don’t worry, we’ll still love you. After all, you can always get one of these:
…that is, if you’re brave enough.